Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
