I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
