He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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