let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
