Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize