I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
