If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Randomize
