either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
