We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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