We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
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