i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
