Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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