ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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