Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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