Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Randomize
