if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
