you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
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