im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize