Pants 0. Shit 1.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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