oh god the rape fog is back!
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize