Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry deathfromabove hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(865): View more from Tennessee

all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.

Fav 8 3652 1384
share tweet
(804): View more from Virginia

Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.

Fav 14 3542 1375
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(229): View more from Georgia

Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes

Fav 3 943 1280
share tweet
(303): View more from Colorado

accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...

Fav 4 2754 853
share tweet
(205): View more from Alabama

Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.

Fav 3 1560 890
share tweet
(443): View more from Maryland

okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.

Fav 3 1925 742
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(214): View more from Texas

I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido

Fav 4 923 532
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(813): View more from Florida

Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour

Fav 2 289 425
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(862): View more from New Jersey

How was it?

(1-862): View more from New Jersey

i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night

Fav 0 72 11
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT