and you said cock pushups were impossible
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
