Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
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