Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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