I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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