So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
another moral hangover. fuck.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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