my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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