i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I lost the right to judge tonight
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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