You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
