i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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