please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Randomize
