It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
