In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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