I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
