I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Randomize