Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize