That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
