The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
tell me about the fingering
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
