Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
