Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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