I love black thongs
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
