I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
it's like heaven, but drunker
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
