I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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