you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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