The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
