Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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