Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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