omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Randomize