she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Randomize
