i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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