piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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