if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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