help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
